Eight months of nothing, of no real opportunities and no ideas. Now today all of a sudden there are three, THREE! really great positions open and I have to decide what to do. None of them are guaranteed to me, but I have a pretty good shot at all of them. One is at least a year in South Africa, and part of me is super excited about this possibility. I have been getting restless and would love to have more overseas experience. Another position is here in Canada with some possibility of short term travel and is with the emergencies and humanitarian aid side of things. So it would be similar to what I've already done, but a new challenge. The last position may be based here or overseas, I don't know yet, but involves looking after the program I helped start while I was in Rwanda.
So I have some praying and thinking to do!
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
Saturday, July 25, 2009
It's about time...
I have actually missed posting on my blog. It has been months since I last posted, and though I have occastionally started composing a post I never finished because I realized that I have nothing interesting to say. But today I decided to post anyway.
I still don't have a job and am quickly losing any motivation to send out resumes and cover letters since they don't seem to be doing any good. I have heard rumours that a position I want at WV may soon be back on the books, but after 7 months I am not holding my breath.
I am amazed at how much this unemployment thing is affecting me. I know intellectually that my identity and worth is not tied to my employment status but the rest of me is having trouble remembering that. Seven months. That is how long I lived in Rwanda. It is almost as long as I worked for WV in Mississauga. In my new year's post I talked about a snow covered path that I was waiting for God to show me. I am still trudging through the same snow and I still can't see what is infront of me. Did I miss something along the way? I am getting restless and frustrated and I am having to try harder and harder to remember to be patient. Trusting and waiting are getting really old and I can't help but ask God "Really? I'm STILL waiting? Really?!" My conversations with God are getting more intense. I know God can handle my anger and I am relating to the Fray's "I Found God" a little too well these days. "Waiting by the telephone, but it never rang - all I needed was I call but it never came." But I also know with great certainty that God is Good, that he is Faithful and that he has a plan. So even in the midst of my frustration and mounting depression over this situation, I know and trust that he is in control.
In the midst of this, I am trying to enjoy summer while it is here. I've been to two weddings, a couple of my friends have had, or are having, babies (hang in there Amp!!)and I've spent a lot of time with friends and family. I've been playing Ultimate frisbee every sunday afternoon, I helped with our church's VBS program and I am considering going up to camp for a week next month since they still need cabin leaders. I am enjoying my vegetable garden which is growing into a huge jungle of tomatoe and zucchini plants and I am diligently checking a dozen different websites for job opportunities and sending out dozens of resumes. I got to reconnect with my friend Melissa last week while she was in town for our friend's wedding and she helped me put a few things in perspective. I went camping in June and am hoping for at least one more trip this summer. So not everything is frustrating or depressing. Hopefully I will have more cheerful posts in the near future and not wait another three months!
I still don't have a job and am quickly losing any motivation to send out resumes and cover letters since they don't seem to be doing any good. I have heard rumours that a position I want at WV may soon be back on the books, but after 7 months I am not holding my breath.
I am amazed at how much this unemployment thing is affecting me. I know intellectually that my identity and worth is not tied to my employment status but the rest of me is having trouble remembering that. Seven months. That is how long I lived in Rwanda. It is almost as long as I worked for WV in Mississauga. In my new year's post I talked about a snow covered path that I was waiting for God to show me. I am still trudging through the same snow and I still can't see what is infront of me. Did I miss something along the way? I am getting restless and frustrated and I am having to try harder and harder to remember to be patient. Trusting and waiting are getting really old and I can't help but ask God "Really? I'm STILL waiting? Really?!" My conversations with God are getting more intense. I know God can handle my anger and I am relating to the Fray's "I Found God" a little too well these days. "Waiting by the telephone, but it never rang - all I needed was I call but it never came." But I also know with great certainty that God is Good, that he is Faithful and that he has a plan. So even in the midst of my frustration and mounting depression over this situation, I know and trust that he is in control.
In the midst of this, I am trying to enjoy summer while it is here. I've been to two weddings, a couple of my friends have had, or are having, babies (hang in there Amp!!)and I've spent a lot of time with friends and family. I've been playing Ultimate frisbee every sunday afternoon, I helped with our church's VBS program and I am considering going up to camp for a week next month since they still need cabin leaders. I am enjoying my vegetable garden which is growing into a huge jungle of tomatoe and zucchini plants and I am diligently checking a dozen different websites for job opportunities and sending out dozens of resumes. I got to reconnect with my friend Melissa last week while she was in town for our friend's wedding and she helped me put a few things in perspective. I went camping in June and am hoping for at least one more trip this summer. So not everything is frustrating or depressing. Hopefully I will have more cheerful posts in the near future and not wait another three months!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Happy Easter
It is a little late, but since my blog profile is telling me I haven't posted since February 20th (!?!) I think I'm doing pretty well. So happy Easter everyone!
I have really loved the lenton season this year. Through my small group and other stuff going on at church and in my own head I really got a lot out of the season this year. I am seeing some things in new ways, I've been reminded about some things and I am again able to see God moving, however slowly. This last month has been difficult for me in some ways. I am still unemployed, the dragging on of winter weather affected my mood and I have found that it is easier to be down when you don't have a routine to pull you out of yourself. On the other hand there has been lots to enjoy over the past month. I am glad to be spending more time outside and have been walking places more often then driving when the weather permits it. I turned 25 (again) at the end of March and although my real age has freaked me out a little I'm getting used to it. There are also a couple of possilbe employment opportunities infront of me. Some are more appealing than others and some scare the crap out of me if I think about them too much, but none of them are here in Ontario. I have only applied to these positions so none of them are even remotely sure things but they could take me anywhere from Burundi to Dominican and Haiti to Winnipeg. Or it could all lead to nowhere and something completely different could come up. But I am feeling more optimistic than I have in awhile. Also, my tax return arrived today and it is twice what I thought it was which was a very nice surprise :)
I would like to say that I will try to post more often. I enjoy keeping a blog for a variety of reasons but I don't want to be one of those people who post just to post. So I will try to post more often, and I will also try to pay more attention to what is going on around me so that at least I have something interesting to say. :)
I have really loved the lenton season this year. Through my small group and other stuff going on at church and in my own head I really got a lot out of the season this year. I am seeing some things in new ways, I've been reminded about some things and I am again able to see God moving, however slowly. This last month has been difficult for me in some ways. I am still unemployed, the dragging on of winter weather affected my mood and I have found that it is easier to be down when you don't have a routine to pull you out of yourself. On the other hand there has been lots to enjoy over the past month. I am glad to be spending more time outside and have been walking places more often then driving when the weather permits it. I turned 25 (again) at the end of March and although my real age has freaked me out a little I'm getting used to it. There are also a couple of possilbe employment opportunities infront of me. Some are more appealing than others and some scare the crap out of me if I think about them too much, but none of them are here in Ontario. I have only applied to these positions so none of them are even remotely sure things but they could take me anywhere from Burundi to Dominican and Haiti to Winnipeg. Or it could all lead to nowhere and something completely different could come up. But I am feeling more optimistic than I have in awhile. Also, my tax return arrived today and it is twice what I thought it was which was a very nice surprise :)
I would like to say that I will try to post more often. I enjoy keeping a blog for a variety of reasons but I don't want to be one of those people who post just to post. So I will try to post more often, and I will also try to pay more attention to what is going on around me so that at least I have something interesting to say. :)
Friday, February 20, 2009
I'm not dead yet....
Despite evidence to the contrary, I have not stepped off the edge of the world and I'm not dead. I have just been living a rather boring version of life and haven't had much to say. There have been developments on the job front but all of them have fallen apart so it isn't really worth mentioning. There is still a possibility that I will end up with a feild position with WV but with the hiring freeze there is no guarantee that it will be anytime in the near future. So I'm looking at other opportunities, none of which excite me as much, but at least would let me be employed and prevent the impending insanity.
On the other side of things, there are things on the plus side for being home. I am actually enjoying winter, for the most part, and have enjoyed time with friends and family. I had tea with one of my aunts a couple of weeks ago and we talked for several hours. It was nice! I am loving my church and the various things going on there. I've helped to put together a lent bible study series for small groups and am loving the relationships I'm building with the Young Adults group. Some days I feel really old with all the first years, but I've enjoyed being in a pseudo leadership position.
I do get frustrated with things though. Yesterday I had a bit of a stress freakout while working on a cover letter and finding out about the extent of the WV hiring freeze. Amp was on skype and talked me down a little and then I went for a drive and had a surprise in Zehrs seeing someone I hadn't seen for almost a year, so by the time Pam took me for a walk I had calmed down enough that I didn't feel like I was about to throw up. Today is better :)
On the other side of things, there are things on the plus side for being home. I am actually enjoying winter, for the most part, and have enjoyed time with friends and family. I had tea with one of my aunts a couple of weeks ago and we talked for several hours. It was nice! I am loving my church and the various things going on there. I've helped to put together a lent bible study series for small groups and am loving the relationships I'm building with the Young Adults group. Some days I feel really old with all the first years, but I've enjoyed being in a pseudo leadership position.
I do get frustrated with things though. Yesterday I had a bit of a stress freakout while working on a cover letter and finding out about the extent of the WV hiring freeze. Amp was on skype and talked me down a little and then I went for a drive and had a surprise in Zehrs seeing someone I hadn't seen for almost a year, so by the time Pam took me for a walk I had calmed down enough that I didn't feel like I was about to throw up. Today is better :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)